Your Stuff Sucks And It Will Still Make Money. I Promise.

I have two friends who are trying to break out of their desperately boring jobs and journey across the great divide into entrepreneurship.

They have chosen to write books for Kindle.

I have chosen to help them.

What you are about to read is an email that I sent trying to light the fire under their backsides. It references writing fiction…

But the principles work for ANYTHING that requires you to create something for money.

  • Product creators
  • Fellow copywriters
  • Artists
  • Business managers
  • etc.

You all currently suck.

But you can still make money.

The Email

Good Friday Gents,

I been thinkin’ of ya guys and your author-entrepreneur journey (especially after Dan sent over his Axioms & Zen process).

Sorry if this email comes across harsh. BUT…

Here is the reality…

You guys are newbie writers. I am a newbie writer (only been at this writing thing for 5 years).

We all just a bunch o’ newbs floating around pretending like we know how to tell stories.

Our stuff is really bad. I mean really bad. Like, “let’s be honest here for a second” bad.

In five years we are going to look back at our work and want to reach through the time hole to strangle ourselves to death before we unleash any more terrible words into the world.

If you are having icky feelings about the awfulness of your work… frankly you are probably right. You are probably just being honest with yourself.

Here is why that is awesome…

Because in 2014 you don’t have to be great before you can start.

In 2014 you can make $8,500 a month from two books that took a month to write (in total) and are terribly awful. (My current royalties from one of my pen names)

In 2014 you don’t have to wait around for YEARS in a slush pile, or struggle selling shorts @ $50 a pop to Playboy while juggling a full-time job to achieve your dream.

In 2014 you can start your writing career TODAY.

Think about this:

In 2014 Twilight still outsells stuff by Chuck Palahniuk, Hubert Selby, Jr., John Irving, Ann Lamott etc.

The point is that “good writing” and “good stories” have much less to do with success in fiction than you might imagine. Certainly less to do with success than your subconscious imagines.

Here is what you should do about it…

Your subconscious doesn’t believe a word I am saying right now. You might even feel slightly offended. You probably even want to say, “Well, you are just being Crazy Mike again with your hair brained ideas and prideful self-inflation” and/or “What do YOU know about any of this Mike? When did YOU become the expert all of a sudden?”

I get it.

Been there. Done that.

But lets briefly look at the facts shall we?

The numbers don’t lie.

I am going to make $8,500 this month from a single pen name.

Combined with my other pen names, I will make well over $18,000 in royalties this month alone.

I am not sure where the line of “he knows what he is talking about” starts and ends, but I do know this:

I am a bad writer.

I know my stories suck.I know they don’t follow all of the conventions/tricks/rules that are stuck in my head from absorbing too many “how to write” books.

And yet… the money keeps coming in.


Because I firmly believe in this >>>

And when I say firmly believe… I mean religiously believe.

And when I say religiously believe… I mean, “you are wrong if you don’t agree with that idea” level of belief.

Here is who you should NEVER listen to…

You can listen to me. Or not.

At the end of the day, I really don’t care. I will continue to write, and make money. You will continue to do what you decide to do.

Just know this:

The last people on earth that you should be listening to are people who tell you to change your work AND who AREN’T CREATING WORK THEMSELVES.

Here is why:

People who aren’t slaving away trying to CREATE don’t have 1/100th of the knowledge that YOU DO about your subject/area of expertise.

You can learn more about writing a novel just by sitting your butt in the chair and trying to write the first 1,000 words than someone who reads 100 “How to write a novel” books.

Both of you (referring to my friends) are faithfully engaged in the struggle.

Both of you know MORE than 99% of the American population about HOW TO WRITE A NOVEL.

Simply because you have firsthand experience DOING it.

You have the personal investment. The time. The energy. The constant THINKING FEELING WORRYING about the process.

You have EXPERIENCE – the most valuable thing in the world.

Be Realistic…

Would you trust a surgeon to operate on you if he ONLY had watched a few surgeries on TV but never actually PERFORMED an operation?

“Yeah but, I’m like an avid surgery buff… so you should probably like totally hear me out for a sec… I’ve seen this done 1,000 times.”

If you answered no… then why on God’s green and holy earth are you listening to people who have NEVER written a book before tell you how to write yours?

Arguably, you finishing your book is 1,000 times more important than a surgery.

Any surgery is just a delay in the inevitable.

Your fiction will last beyond your passing through this life.

So Just Write. You’ll Be Rich Either Way.

Trust me. I am making a little bit of money here with really bad stories.

It works.

And you can STILL create the epic wonders that will outlast you.

But you don’t have to do it now. And that’s good because you can’t do it now.

You need the practice anyways.

To your success,